“Identity” has to do with the ability to connect, not to our “essential being” or the control we may think we have about our environment. There are good and bad connections though, and to discriminate them is probably the most important thing to learn. In fact, there aren’t many other things that important in life, and most of them are just a matter of chance
Of course, if I can’t control my identity, no one (no other… identity) should have that power in my stead.